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so this actually happened like a week and a half ago and i'm just now commenting on it but whatever
so i wrote this long long coming-out email to my best best friends telling them about my dysphoria and why i'd been wearing boys clothes and blah blah and at the end i asked them to start calling me Phoenix and using male pronouns
and so most of them were like "omg okay yeah i love you you're great blah blah"
except one person
who didn't reply
but they hadn't been talking to me lately anyway, so i didn't really think much of it
and shortly thereafter, my best best friend Jade had a way less complex way of coming out as genderfluid and asking us to stop referring to her using her birthname, and instead calling her Jade
and once again everyone was like "okay yeah you're great that's fine blah blah"
and so after that, we were hanging out, right, talking to our friend Haley over gmail and shit
but then she started talking to that one person who never emailed me back (uhhhh I'll just call them S)
and i'm not even sure what they were talking about but Jade was suddenly just like "uh S called you a her"
and she let me write this email to S and i said something like "oh my god you're so ignorant it's not that hard to replace a pronoun with a different pronoun blah blah"
and they just got so fuckin angry at that
and i don't even remember what happened exactly but finally Jade just said like "OH MY GOD I AM SO SICK OF DEALING WITH YOU. PHOENIX IS A BOY AND I AM JADE AND I AM GENDERFLUID. IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT JUST STOP FUCKING TALKING TO US."
and S replied with "no. you are both girls. girls named (horrific birthname) and (horrific birthname). okay? that's what it is and you can't change that because that is who you are."
and we were both kinda just like AUGH
WHAT
HOW DAST THOU
so we told Haley about that and guess what she said
"what? who the fuck are (horrific birthname) and (horrific birthname)? you're jade and he's phoenix. S must be cracked."
and it was probably the most glorious few sentences i've ever read in my life
so
i dunno exactly why i'm posting this?
whatever
moral of the story is: for every dick that doesn't support you, there's about a million more people who will.
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just nothing
1 min read
my sister is coming down from oregon today (yaaaaay)!
we're prolly going to dye my hair blue (yaaaaay)!
I'm probably going to get my new account set up before Monday (yaaaaay)!
i'm going to try to finish Attack on Titan (yaaaaay)!
I have like, a bajillion things halfway-written that I will prolly finish and upload to my new account (yaaaaay)!
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just nothing
1 min read
my sister is coming down from oregon today (yaaaaay)!
we're prolly going to dye my hair blue (yaaaaay)!
I'm probably going to get my new account set up before Monday (yaaaaay)!
i'm going to try to finish Attack on Titan (yaaaaay)!
I have like, a bajillion things halfway-written that I will prolly finish and upload to my new account (yaaaaay)!
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Devious Journal Entry
2 min read
i just heard my mother talking about me to my sister
"she doesn't think (horrific birthname) is cute, though. and she keeps saying that she's a boy, no matter how many times i try to tell her that she isn't a boy and will never be a boy. you know how they are at that age"
okay
ow
i don't even know what i'm supposed to do anymore
my dysphoria is getting so bad that i literally CRY when anyone calls me my birthname or she or her or whatever else and everyone that i interact with on a daily basis is horrible and unsupportive except a few of my friends who are really cool and everything but of course i barely even get to talk to them
i don't know
i don't want to live on this stupid fucking planet anymore everyone on it is a fucking prick oh my god
i don't even use this account for art anymore i am literally just a whiny bitch which is why i am probably going to delete this one and make a new one and use it as it was originally intended
oh my fucking god
i don't even know
fuck everything
i am such a horrible person
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what kind of insane loot did you rake in
1 min read
check me out
i got this hella rad Supernatural t-shirt
co-starring my gross hair that i still haven't cut but prolly will soon
and a Dark Magician t-shirt
that i don't really feel like taking a picture of
but anyway
yeah
i raked in some insane loot
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